My husband and I have been married for 7 years. Before everything, we never thought to rush family planning. I was always seeing my friends and family who were older than me having kids so I never thought it would be so difficult.
Little did I know at the time that I had less than a 40% chance of getting pregnant.
In our 4th year of marriage, we decided to start trying to have kids. But my husband and I were both so busy with work. We were really focused on our careers and success so that we could provide the best for our future children. Raising them in a financially stable home was always something that we heavily prioritized.
After about 3 to 4 years of trying to conceive naturally, I realized that it wasn’t working and something must be wrong. I decided it was time to go to the doctor and get checked out.
That was around March 2020. Of course, this is when the pandemic started and it wasn’t the right time to be going out, especially to the doctors.
The pandemic really put us behind in our journey to parenthood and we were of course disappointed, but my husband and I decided that it was an opportunity to focus on our careers for a little longer. So that’s exactly what we did.
Waiting out the pandemic, it had been another year or two. At the beginning of 2023, I sat my husband down and told him because I was 40 now, we needed to make a decision. Are we going to do IVF or go the adoption route?
Either route we chose, we would love our kids no matter how they came into our lives. We ultimately concluded that we at least want to try IVF first.
The start of our journey
The first step for us was to go to the doctor and get checked out. I was able to find an OBGYN in Alhambra, CA. With this doctor, both my husband and I did a few diagnostic lab tests to see where we were at.
It turned out that we both had factors contributing to our inability to conceive. My hormone levels were very low and likely because my husband is a smoker, he had low sperm quality.
The news worried us very much so we asked the doctor if there were any medications we could take or any solutions that we could use.
The doctor told us that our best bet would be to do IVF and to our luck and convenience, RFC was located right below us.
Our doctor gave us a referral so of course, we went right downstairs and were able to get an appointment the same day. We were also happy that RFC has Chinese-speaking employees who could help us translate! Chinese is my first language so doing the process in Chinese is much easier for me and they were so patient with me.
We met Dr. Lin and this was the start of our IVF journey.
My IVF experience
It was August 2023 and we were getting ready to start in vitro fertilization (IVF). In the beginning, I had to do so many injections, which felt endless. The injectables were to get my hormone levels up and prepare my body for the egg retrieval. This part of the process was particularly hard for me.
I felt lucky I didn’t have any severe symptoms from the medication. I did feel a loss of energy but nothing I couldn’t handle. I told myself to be strong and that this was God giving my husband and me a chance to find our path.
By the time it was October, I was ready to have my eggs retrieved. At this point, I was so excited but also still very filled with worry. I didn’t know how many of my eggs could be retrieved and in the back of my mind, I thought I might not have enough or worse, any at all.
To my surprise, Dr. Lin was able to retrieve 10 eggs and I thank God for that. Even Dr. Lin was surprised. But now that the eggs were retrieved, we had to wait for them to be made into embryos.
We were able to have 3 embryos made! Now came the embryo transfer step. I was nervous of course, but Dr. Lin was really great and considerate.
He told me we could do the transfer right away, or we could wait until the chances of the embryo successfully implanting were higher. He wanted to be 100 percent certain that the transfer was going to stick so he suggested that we wait until my uterus was really really ready.
I held off for about a month after the embryos were made and did the transfer. Now came the wait; waiting was horrible. For 2 weeks I was nervous, struggling, and downright worried sick it didn’t work and I wouldn’t be pregnant.
Looking back at myself now, I was pretty funny. I was so nervous and cautious with my body because I was so scared something would happen and I wouldn’t get pregnant. For those 2 weeks, I didn’t do anything. I was extremely gentle and didn’t even want to risk taking the stairs just in case I fell and got hurt. Looking back now, I was definitely overly cautious.
Well, the 2 weeks were finally up and we went to the clinic for our appointment. The moment they told me I was pregnant I was in complete shock. I couldn’t believe it; I was sobbing with joy. My husband and I have been trying for seven years and we were finally going to have a baby.
How my pregnancy is going
I knew going in that the first 3 months of pregnancy are super important. So I took that very seriously. I paid very close attention to my body and what it needed. I continued to take hormone treatment medication during this time to keep my hormone levels up.
I felt like I had really bad pregnancy symptoms; they were so strong. I had extremely low energy, so much so that I could barely work. I would also sometimes feel dizzy and had some trouble breathing. And when the morning sickness came in, it came in strong.
Luckily, the morning sickness part is over now.
I also have very bad food aversions. I can no longer eat meat and everything tastes like cardboard. For the first 3 months of my pregnancy, I couldn’t even cook because the smell of food would make me sick. Even if the food was delicious and smelled amazing.
Because of my food aversions, I make sure I still get enough protein and nutrients so that my baby and I stay healthy. Every day I made sure to eat foods I could handle and that are beneficial to our baby. I eat tofu, eggs, and cheese for protein and I make sure to drink a glass of milk every day for the baby’s bones.
My husband has been so amazing and helpful. He’s been great at helping me find foods that I can actually eat and making sure I’m taken care of. He’s working extra hard right now to save up as much as we can before the baby comes.
Why I’m sharing my story
I’m sharing my story because I want my experiences to encourage other ladies to not give up and keep believing. I want to convey that I wouldn’t be where I am today without my faith and pushing myself. There are of course others around you to offer you support, but in the end, it’s up to you to persevere and get yourself through the difficult times.
I know what it’s like to have little hope and feel like the unluckiest person in the world. But I just had to remember that I wasn’t alone. I think about how fortunate I am to have the people I do in my life like my husband and to have my faith.
I had to remember that I am not given more than what I can handle. It also helped that I listened to music every day and sang a lot during this time. I’m not very good at all but it sure did cheer me up.
It felt like God laid out a path for me and it was up to me to follow it. The journey was not easy. It was long and hard but also exciting and happy. Life wouldn’t be so amazing if there weren’t any ups and downs, otherwise it would just be boring. I like to see my life as a blank page, and it’s up to me to put something on it.
And my pages, they are now filled with the story of how our son came into our lives. I’d like to thank RFC, Dr. Lin, and Florrie. Without them, I would not be 6 months pregnant right now. Coming to RFC was all part of God’s plan for me. I only went to one doctor for an evaluation and it just so happened that Dr. Lin was in the very same building and I saw him that very day. I sometimes have to stop and think “What were the chances?”
As for now, my husband and I are getting ready for our son’s arrival. I’m making sure to take care of my body and take my medication to keep my blood pressure down. My husband is continuing to work hard and is already thinking about future kids!
We still have two more embryos we can use and we are both so excited! But for now, I’m going to focus on the one I have right now and make sure my husband and I raise him right.
