15 years ago my husband and I got married. I was 28 years old and we decided that it was time to start trying for a baby.
It seemed simple enough, after all, I was still young.
Well, to our surprise, I had premature ovarian failure.
How we ended up at RFC
After 2 years of trying for a baby with no success, we visited our primary care physician to look for answers. We had started treatments there but unfortunately had no success. Devasted of course, but it ultimately led us to meet Dr. Lin at Reproductive Fertility Center.
Discovering I had premature ovarian failure completely devasted me. I never thought that I would struggle with infertility, especially at such a young age. I felt blindsided.
There wasn’t anyone around me that had similar issues. It felt like everyone else could just have kids. If they wanted to, they would. My younger siblings started having children before me and it was frustrating, to say the least. My friends were having kids as well while I struggled with my infertility.
The feeling, at my best, made me sad, and at my worst, made me jaded. It was difficult for me to be around kids. Made it difficult to be around my friends’ and family’s kids. So much so that I didn’t even want to go to baby showers simply because it hurt too much to be around kids at all, knowing that I couldn’t have my own.
But as I opened up, I learned that others have had similar experiences, even my friends.
A few friends of mine also struggled with fertility issues in the past and had also gone to Dr. Lin. They’d done his treatments and came out pregnant. From what it seemed like, there wasn’t anyone who went to him who wasn’t successful.
I thought to myself, he must be a really good doctor if all my friends were able to get pregnant. So I decided I wanted to stay with him for my treatments.
And I’m certainly glad I did.
My treatment journey
Starting fertility treatments, I quickly learned that my Anti-Müllerian Hormone (AMH) levels were low. My blood work always indicated it and it was getting lower throughout the years. Before the age of 40, this is called premature ovarian failure, when your ovaries don’t produce enough hormones to release eggs.
But this isn’t to say there wasn’t any hope. I mean, it certainly felt like it, but Dr. Lin always said:
“It only takes one egg to make a baby."
And that gave me hope.
I started my fertility journey with Intrauterine Insemination (IUI). At the time, it was more affordable as opposed to IVF. Fertility treatments are expensive and I didn’t want it to become a financial burden. So, we started with what we could and did IUI.
After only two inseminations, I was pregnant. But it quickly turned south.
By my 6th week, I miscarried.
It was painful and traumatic, and it devastated me. Negative test after negative test, I had finally gotten a positive pregnancy result. But it failed, leaving me heartbroken.
It was painful and traumatic, and it devastated me. Negative test after negative test, I had finally gotten a positive pregnancy result. But it failed, leaving me heartbroken.
My insurance allowed for six more IUI attempts after a miscarriage. But after what had happened, I needed a break, so we stopped treatments for a while.
Over the next few years, I did all 6 additional IUI attempts. The journey was difficult and my inseminations weren’t consistent. The sporadic nature and time between my visits were due to financial barriers but mostly because of the emotional toll it took on me.
By the end of it, after a total of 8 attempts at IUI, I was still not pregnant.
It was time for IVF
Finally, I decided it was time for In Vitro Fertilization (IVF). It had been years now. I was getting older, 40, and had ultimately decided to just pay for it and get it out of the way.
I was now prepared financially for it. I got a raise, saved, and came up with a payment plan that worked for us. Despite the cost, I knew it would be worth it.
I was able to get seven eggs retrieved. Not much, but enough. Like Dr. Lin says, you only need one egg. Out of my seven eggs retrieved, we fertilized four and froze all four embryos.
For my first frozen embryo transfer, we implanted two embryos. One stuck, and that embryo is now my 2-year-old daughter.
My pregnancy
When I got my positive pregnancy test, I was so excited I almost couldn’t believe it.
They always tell you not to take your own pregnancy test during the 2-week wait after an insemination or transfer.
This wasn’t my first time around waiting out those 2 weeks to see if I was pregnant. Those 2 weeks are awful, just awful. Filled with anticipation and suspense. So of course, I had taken at-home pregnancy tests in my previous waiting periods. But I hated how many of those 2-weeks I went through when they all resulted in a negative result. So this time around, I didn’t bother to take a test before visiting the clinic again.
After drawing my blood, the clinic confirmed I was finally pregnant again. I was in surreal shock. I thought to myself, “No way”. But it was real, and I was finally pregnant.
For months I watched every step I took, every twitch I felt, because I didn’t feel like my pregnancy was real. After my first miscarriage, I was so worried about it happening again so I counted every week. I waited until week 6, then 7, then 9, but my pregnancy didn’t feel real to me until I was holding my baby girl in my arms.
I have a 2-year-old daughter now and I couldn’t be more grateful. While my pregnancy journey was long and difficult, it was absolutely worth it!
I’m pregnant again!
My first pregnancy with my daughter was difficult on my body so I was hesitant to try again.
However, my husband and I decided that we should utilize the other 2 frozen embryos; so, I did another transfer. I told myself that if it sticks, then it does and I’ll be blessed with another child, but if it doesn’t, then it’s okay and that’ll be the last of it. I already had my daughter it was going to be okay.
But to my joy, another embryo successfully implanted and I’m pregnant again!
I have similar health issues with this pregnancy as I had with my last but I’m keeping positive.
My advice for fertility journeys
This journey has been tumultuous and there were times when it was difficult to stay positive. I wanted to give up and felt like I couldn’t do it anymore. But I told myself to not give up and gave myself grace.
I pulled my bootstraps up, kept going, went big with IVF, and now my dreams are coming true.
For others going through something similar, don’t melt down, and more importantly, don’t give up. No matter the obstacle you face, the reward is greater than any obstacle in your way.
My family is complete
Now with this pregnancy, our family is complete. We have a peaceful and happy life with our amazing, smart, and funny daughter. We’re patiently waiting for baby #2 to join us!
Everyone at RFC was so good! Cynthia was my coordinator and she was always there for me. She was like my cheerleader in the background, always so optimistic and supportive.
Dr. Lin was obviously amazing. He was just what I needed, encouraging but also realistic. I’ve appreciated his honesty throughout the years. I also saw Dr. Park a few times in the beginning; she was also encouraging and supportive. It was Dr. Park who gave me hope in those initial days. She shared a story about a patient with a similar experience who ended up getting pregnant against the odds.
I’ve been with Dr. Lin and RFC since their very beginning when they only had one tiny location in the Inland Empire. I’m so glad I trusted my gut and stuck with Dr. Lin. Now, my husband, daughter, and I are excitedly anticipating the arrival of our newest addition, due in a few months!
